📜 Ordain: Divine Decrees & Holy Handshakes 🤲✨
Expanded Definition & Meaning
To “ordain” is to issue a royal decree—although in this case, royalty means divine authority. Let’s break it down:
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Divine Blueprints 📐: God can ordain events to occur without directly causing them, much like a celestial architect. Think of it as setting the cosmic stage, tuning the instruments, and watching the orchestra of free will play out. For example, the delightful garden of Eden was setup, Adam and Eve pranced around freely, and by their own choosy ways, they brought upon The Fall. It’s a divine drama, folks!
-
Holy Appointments 🙌: Ordain can also mean the ceremonial recognition of an individual to a specific office or calling, imprinted with an existential job title. Ministers are given this heavenly thumbs-up through the laying on of hands. Imagine your favorite movie coronation scene, but with more spiritual pizzazz and way less CGI.
Synonyms
- Decree
- Appoint
- Consecrate
- Sanctify
- Enact
Antonyms
- Rescind
- Demote
- Disband
- Desecrate
Key Takeaways
📌 Preordained Roles and Cosmic Functions: Ordaining sets up the universe like a well-oiled existential machine.
📌 Formal Appointment of Clergymembers: Laying on hands marks the decisive “You’re in, dude!” moment.
Importance
Theological Contexts: The act of ordaining helps followers grasp the intricate divine directives and the significance of their spiritual leaders.
Practical Implementation: Ensures the church leadership structure is in divine sync, much like a symphony without a rogue triangle player.
Types
- Divine Decrees: Prophecies and cosmic setups.
- Ministerial Ordination: The ceremonial vetting of clergy members.
Examples
- Down Here: Pastor Bob being ordained to now baptize, preach, and fulfill life’s wisdom dispensary duties.
- Up There: God pre-setting the historical stages without personally scripting every single act.
Funny Quotes
🌟 “Ordaining: Proof that divine plans involve both Big Bangs and Small Blessings.”
🌟 “When God ordains, it’s less about scripting and more about setting the stage for divine improv!”
Suggested Literature
- 📖 “Divine Decrees and Human Actions: A Theology of Ordination”
- 📖 “Ordaining Authority: Spiritual Leadership and You in the 21st Century”
Related Terms
- Decree (a formal statement with big consequences)
- Minister (one groovy ordained soul)
- Sanctify (to set apart for a special purpose)
Comparison: Ordain vs. Decree
| Aspect | Ordain | Decree |
|---|---|---|
| Magic Touch | Laying on hands, literally and metaphorically | Official-sounding divine proclamation |
| Human Touch | Recognizing ministers and leadership roles | Often leaves execution to mortal beings |
| Feelings | Personal, warm and fuzzy | Administrative, majestic |
Pros and Cons
🥂 Ordain Pros: Personal, community-centric.
⁉️ Ordain Cons: Can feel a tad elitist if not inclusive.
💬 Decree Pros: Majestic, sounds like you’re in a Shakespeare play.
💼 Decree Cons: Less warm and huggy.
Quizzes 📚
May divine wisdom guide your next steps, touching your path with both humor and grace. 🌟 Until next time, keep the light-hearted spirit alive and well! 😇
Yours Ordain-arily,
Reverend Laugh-A-Lot, October 11, 2023
“Keep faith humorous, and you’ll never have a dull sermon!”
